Spicy Dragons & Dinosaurs

I started an entry three times today and each time was distracted. This is Julia's fifth day off and we are running out of things to do in the house and the house is a mess. Still, Julia is becoming a better companion all the time.

I have changed the way that I deal with Julia's hitting or yelling at me. Starting last week, I have been asking her to come closer and I hold her face to look into eachother's eyes while I count to 10 or 15. As I count, always reminding her to look in my eyes, I begin to smily at her and sometimes brush her cheek. So I start with a neutral face and voice (and since she has just yelled at me or tried or hurt me, I think smiling in the beginning would not make sense) and more to a smiling and loving voice and look. In the last days, we have done this over and over. It doesn't take all that long, and I noticed today that Julia is not as resistant as she was when we started. This has not, however, stopped her from hitting or yelling at me, or harassing the dog.

Nice bunch of days, although for the last two I have not slept very well. Or long. Both evenings I was tired enough to go up to be before 11 and then read until I thought I could fall asleep. Then I didn't, not until 3 or so.

Yesterday, I was the primary teacher at sunday school. I have been lead teacher once every three weeks since the fall, and yet, for the first time Julia was very jealous that I was attending to other children. She gave Erin a hard time and then after spending some time out of the classroom, she tried to hit me and pull my hair. It was one of the times that I was able to pull her close, have her breath slowly or at least deeply, and look into her eyes. I told her that I was teaching all of the children but that I was her mommy, and only her mommy. After this, I pulled her onto my lap and went on teaching. I did not know what was going on inside her head, but as class was coming to a close, David came into class and volunteered to go and get the car while I finished up. Julia went with him but was worried that I wasn't going to come home.

We still have work to do.

Our attachment therapist called today and we have an appointment for Thursday! This Thursday! I can't wait to start this work.

Julia and I thought about going skating today. There are all sort of little ice skating spots all over town. There is one pretty close to us and pretty idylic looking. A small lagoon with an old wooden shed where they rent skates and sell hot cocoa. There is no zamboni, but people shovel and sweep. There were squares for hockey practice and circles for a few teens practicing twirls. There was plenty of space to learn and fall. There were a few little ones doing just that. Julia did not want to try to put on skates. We walked out on the ice with our boots on and she was fascinated by the hockey players. We walked around for awhile and then went home. Next time, we'll put on skates.