Just a comment to a quote

You don’t really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around – and why his parents will always wave back. ~William D. Tammeus

My daughter came home at 5.5 years old. The first time she rode on a merry-go-round, she laughed and cheered. That first summer, I stood by her horse, holding on to her because I was afraid she might fall off.

The next year, she rode on her own. I stood on the side and like all the goofy parents waved like a crazy woman each time my daughter's horse came by. She didn't wave. She didn't even look at me. She was intent on riding, looking forward or all around, or at the ceiling that was painted blue with gold stars.

I felt the by-then familiar thump in the depth of my stomach -- she had no idea that she was supposed to wave, or even look for me. It was not that she couldn't wave but that no one had ever put her on a merry-go-round, or a little boat, or a pony and then stood on the side cheering her on. The process of learning to be a family takes a long time.

Now, her third summer in our family, my daughter knows how to look for me in a crowd, how to yell, "Mommy!", and wave as passionately as any other kid who rides the merry-go-round. Another year, another lesson.