Spicy Dragons & Dinosaurs

I think a little blogging time is in order. It is Monday afternoon. Julia and I went to speech and OT this morning before visiting David. Then, I took Julia home to be with her therapist, Morgan, who is staying on to baby sit. I came back to sit in the hospital and wait for them to pull the breathing tube out of David's throat. How did a breathing tube get to be so normal a part of every day life? I've talked to David's Dad and Cheshire, and written a long email to a friend. I still wait. I called Morgan to extend her time another hour with the hope that I will be here when the exebate (spelling???) him. I've gotten pretty good at hospital room sitting.

The answer to David's Saturday night question about whether we should call 911: David's heart doc came in to talk to me (which was very nice b/c he had already done rounds). He told me that David was "really sick" on saturday night and that he actually "kind of scared" the ER docs by getting sicker right before their eyes. He told me that it was very good that we got to the hospital when we had. And so, to David's question: Yes! Yes. Yes. It was the right time to call 911.

So people ask if I am alright. Nurses ask. Do I look that bad? I am fine; I am so disappointed we can't go to Chris and Sophie's wedding. I have faith we will get through this; I am scared this is what our new normal will be like. I am in charge and together, I am a mess and falling apart. But do I look that bad?

I am still reeling from Saturday night's adventures, almost but not quite on a steady keel. Some things I am noticing:

I am awful at figuring out what someone wants when they can't speak. It took me 10 minutes to decide that David really wanted to sit up a bit. I just have no skills at interpreting physical needs.

I am finding more and more ways, ordinary, everyday ways to teach Julia. I am taking very seriously this idea of teaching her what she wants to learn. She asks about all the tubes coming out of Daddy, and what they are for, and if they hurt, and if they are brushing his teeth, etc. And I tell her what I know and ask the nurses to explain the rest. And Julia goes home and sets up her squirrels in the play mobil hospital and the doc squirrel put an IV into Zoe squirrel. I notice that she is pointing to numbers on elevators quicker and I ask her to do it more often. I notice she is answering more questions and so I ask more. Small thing all. Clearly, I will not be doing much formal teaching this week. I am just trying to get from day to day right now, keeping us going, keeping us in food and clean clothes. I am hoping for a really good night's sleep tonight. I am hoping that Julia still wants to read her current favorite book.

Finally, finally, the docs have taken the breathing tube out of David (5:10 pm). He is not ready to be awake and talking but from what they say, today has been a very good day for him. Numbers are improving. We need another day or two to see what his time line will look like -- when he will come home and what kind of recovery this will need -- but he is definitely improving now. "He turned the corner" is what the doc said. I am thinking that David is sicker than I've ever seen him. The docs are pretty comfortable and confident that they can fix what is wrong, Still, it is scary to see him so very sick.