Last day of camp

So this is not such a great photo but it's what I got and it is the last day of camp! Like every other day the last 6 weeks, Julia came home hungry and in a great mood. We didn't get any anxious phone calls or any complaints apart from an occasional word that she didn't feel well on the bus. I watched Julia try to socialize many days as we waited for the bus and by the end, some of the other kids would talk to her or answer her questions. Still, she has a long way to go to really fit in with kids. Julia has such spirit and such endurance. I admire this about her and sometimes wish I could I could borrow some of her spirit.
So, a little better picture. And doesn't she look happy.

Julia and I worked tonight. She was able to work for an hour and work through a rough patch about connecting dots. Oh, connecting the dots. I think we are into a battle of wills. I am trying to teach her this skill, and not doing such a good job. I went from trying to get her to go from a dot labeled with the alphabet to two dots that I wanted her to draw a line to connect. At some point she absolutely refused to do it, but in the nicest way possible. "It hard." "I no want do this." "No thank you." We tried on paper and then on the magna-doodle. I explained every part of the task; I demonstrated; and she did not want to do it. I got close to very frustrated and angry, but held it back and drew BIG dots to connect. She finally did it and then did it thre more times. Hopefully, we can move to labeled dots very soon.

She did do wondefully as we worked on the alphabet. We did our putnik cheers; she wrote letterw when I made signs, and I again tried to point out letters and have her make the sound. She is getting better at separating the putnik cheer and giving me the part of it that I am asking for. We also did the "an" page on starfall.com. It is the very beginning of learning to read and we got through the first page very successfully. Julia put the c, p, r, and another letter in front of the AN and made the words to match the pictures. I was surprised that it was so easy for her, and we will be doing this more often now.

I bought a CD player and found a belt with a CD pocket. We are using an old set of sony headphones that basically complies with the requirements of headphones for the listening therapy. So, we can proceed. We missed an evening and morning playing -- not that bad at all. Julia no longer resists playing her music, and actually asked about her music the evening that we did not have the equipment.

I put together a binder of printouts of alphabet sheets, direction sheets, and connect the dot sheets. Hopefully, we will be able to take time during our vacation and do some of the work. And it will be fun. I hope.

Tough morning

Rough morning. Julia did not want to get going. She delayed on getting dressed, getting hair and teeth done, on getting out the door. We wound up taking the car and putting on shoes and socks in the car. There doesn't seem to be a why here apart from her general good behavior for the last few days and two little pets which are on top of the frig until her gets enough stickers on her behavior/work chart. She was between anger and frustration, and trying to please us last night as we praised her for being patient for waiting for her little pet. We did have to correct her a number of times, but she tried really hard to calm down and be patient.

So, was that it? Maybe.

Even her delay this morning was not so bad. I wanted to walk to the bus but driving was not so bad. The bad part started when she sat on the ground and said she didn't want to go to camp, thank you. One of the parents later commented on how clear and articulate Julia is in her anger. Okay, that is true. She tells it like it is and this morning she didn't like me and didn't want to do what I ask.

I just called camp and the bus counselor said that after 15 minutes she was smiling and fine. She is being a bit quieter than usual at camp, but no problem. They will call if anything comes up. (What a great place!).

Ah, something that just slipped my mind -- today is Julia's half birthday and we were going to make a big deal about it because she finally understands about birthdays. After OT this afternoon, I was going to take her to buy a little cake, cook her favorite bok choi supper, and give her a present. I hope that her afternoon mood can take that.

Ah, one of those gorgeous Wisconsin days that seduces the snow weary heart. The sun is soft, the breeze is steady, the bugs are few. We walked to the camp bus a new way, cutting through the apartment complex that is at the top of our street. The complex sits on a hill and we have to walk up and go a long way down to get to the sidewalk. This is great for Julia's calves and a bit of a short cut -- no reason to complain. Julia was a bit scared of walking downhill but when I gave her the choice of the easier driveway or the steeper grassy hill, it was the hill all the way.

Thank you, dear readers and visitors, who drop in and leave messages or emails. I do feel at times bouyed up by the support and advice. And sometimes inspired -- last night, I was working with Julia on a sheet that asked her to count the words in a sentence. We have been working on letters and sounds and have no done any math to speak of -- unless, counting stickers counts. The work sheet presented a sentence and a choice of 3, 4, or 5 at the end to circle. Well, Julia did not know 3 and 4. So, we went over these over and over again. It seemed like a much more than necessary amount of times. And I was losing patience and I could feel the frustration mount. The lovely messages about how patient I appear to be came back to me, and yes, made the difference. Excuse the excess of sappiness. But I could feel the support that I have been offered and felt the core strength to live up to what others say that I have.

And if Julia knew, I am sure she would thank my supports from the bottom of her heart. LOL. Who needs a frustrated mommy!

Julia watched part of Bambi last night before bedtime and this morning she tried telling everyone at the bus stop about the movie. In her own way, of course. which means that she was talking about rather random parts of the movie without identifying that she watched a movie, the movie was Bambi, and that she liked the story and wanted to share it. Rather, she talked aobut the two deers fighting for Fileen, Thumper sleeping in a log, and Bambi skating. In part, it breaks my heart watching her try to make her version of conversation when other kids don't really know how to respond to her. In part, I see that I can coach her at home or when we walk to the bus, but must let her fend for herself when she tries to be friendly and relate to other people.

I am going outside to edit those flower beds and plant more grass seed.

Tuesday morning

We woke up late this morning -- 7 a.m. -- David had left for work already. I dressed Julia before we went downstairs and we ate in front of the TV watching her favorite letter/spelling show, "Super Y." Then she became cantankerous. She didn't want to brush teeth, comb hair, or go to camp. I pushed her steadily to do those things and we rode the bike to the camp bus. (Notice my attempt to mix up the way that we get to the bus stop.) She was fine on the bike ride. She is getting better at keeping her balance and she likes the speed and the wind blowing in her face.

When we got to the bus stop, she did a lot of yelling -- No bus, I hate bus, Julia go home, Julia not go camp bus. Anyone who didn't know she was capable of that behavior, knows now. Yes, I can still be a bit embarassed. I speak calmly to her but try to enforce and re-enforce that message that she is getting on the bus and going to camp.

I think that I see her give up a bit -- her bravado blows over, and she is ready to bow to my will. Oh, the delicate line between teaching her and breaking her incredible spirit. I am hoping for the first, and expect that she will need the later to fly into her adult life. She finds some sticks to play with and eventually when it is time to get on the bus, she happily gets on and waves as it pulls away. She scares her counselors, but I tell them that when she has mornings like this in school, she is usually good as gold the rest of the day. At least, that's what her teachers tell me.

I received lots of answers to my question about diet and supplement and autism. I have to write lots of thank yous and have a chunk of research to do. Cutting out food from our diet is something we can just try ourselves, but giving Julia supplements is something I pause at. Maybe we need a doc visit once I figure out what looks good.

We have been making headway on our letters and also on reading our first two sight "words" which are "a" and "I." Making her read these words as we read a book at night can slow down the action, but it also makes me realize how frequently she is focused on the printing in any book. Not much in general, but sometimes I get her attention quite well. It can be amazing how few A's and I's there are in a story.

Today, I'd like to do her evening lesson on another sight word. I am thinking of adding "and" to our list. I notice lots of and's in stories.

Update

Julia told me last night that her legs, particularly her calfs, hurt sometimes at camp. Wow! This was just what I wanted to work on this summer and she is doing it. We have been doing lots of activities involving calfs because hers are weak. We walk down our steps using both legs, we walk in the pool whenever I can get her to do it, and we are walking to the camp bus. When I picked her up at camp yesterday to go to speech therapy, I could see the amount of running and walking that the kids do. Not to much for normal developing kids but probably a bit too much for Julia. No wonder her legs hurt at night. I rubbed her calfs and it seemed to help a bit. I will consider saying something to her counselors if she keeps complaining, but she seems to be keeping up which is so cool.

The bugs, the bugs, the bugs! Julia was not too crazy about the bug spray on Monday. Today, she asked for it.

She is such an amazingly friendly child -- we walked to the bus with one of the counselors -- a guy named, David. Julia tried to engage him in her type of conversation. He did not get it at all, but she didn't quit. So many good qualities for her life!

Have I written how dirty she is when she gets home. It is great! Even after swimming. She did say something last night about being pushed into the pool or being splashed by other kids. She was not upset by it, but said she did not have her goggles on.

First day of camp

Monday!

Once again, I started this last night and lost momentum.

Saturday morning, we decided to forego swimming lessons – first time we've blown this off – and head for our local greasy spoon for breakfast. I had a swiss cheese omlet and I think it was Velveta Swiss – Is there such a thing? I ordered the kid's pancake for Julia and she was given the biggest single pancake I've ever seen. She polished it off in short order and proceeded to have some of my omlet and David's sausage. She has been eating this weekend! Interesting, because she has been pretty picky lately.

We visited the zoo but the river otters – our family fav – were not in their deep water swimming place. Too much disappointment! The brown bears were looking good, the big polar bear was pensive. We ate popcicles and admired the peacocks.

Sound slow and sweet. It was and we needed it. Tomorrow is the first day of day camp for Julia, and I suspect that much of her trying behavior is due to this transition. She has been grumpy, quicker to anger than usual (Although Julia is usually quick to say she is angry at us), and every time we entered a store, which we did far too much of, Julia started asking for things – toys, candy, gloves! Well, I hope that this behavior is related to starting camp!

To ease this transition, I've made Julia a little book with her camp schedule, representive pictures and a few real pictures that I took at camp last week in it. I read it after I made it and again last night before bed. It didn't seem to make an impression but this morning was relatively smoothly. We did some of our alphabet work (about a third of what we have been doing, but I am very satisfied for our first day). I applied her sun screen and bug stuff, got her dressed, she ate, and at 8 we were off walking to Franklin School. We had 20 minutes to get there and needed 10. I anticipated some problems but they never materalized. She because pretty excited about going to camp, especially about the outdoor pool which she had seemed to ignor when we visited the place. There were a little group of moms and dads seeing kids off for the first day. A few familiar faces and at least one girl for Julia to say hi to. She got on line as soon as the bus came, had to be reminded to kiss me, and boarded quite merrily.

I will have the phone with me all day, just in case.

Other developments this weekend:

Cheshire lived through her first week of class – a bit dazed, a bit bored as one can be in a new and confusing place, a bit overwhelmed. She has her first interview this morning and it conflicts with her own classes. This situation was not covered and she could not get anyone to okay it, but I can't imagine that she will get demerit for job hunting.

We found a three whelled scooter for Julia when we were at Farm and Fleet (hardware for the serious farmer and truck driver???). It is what we should have had from the beginning. There are a number of things that if I had my druthers I would do differently with Julia – preschool at the JCC instead of kindergarten in Indy. She has to work on steering and moving and staying upright but there is no balance issue and that seems good. We walked and scooted around two blocks last evening while we were looking for dead fish.

The full report from the Waisman Center finally got to us. It is long and extensive and I expect to really read it some time this week. Short version – Julia is operating on a 3-4 year old level as of March. It made me gulp and panic for a moment but I agree with the assessment. When I think of her as a 3 or 4 year old, her behavior seems much more appropriate. And she is gaining ground all the time. The two things I don't see in my scan of the report are (1) that she is limited by her diagnosis, and (2) that her behaviors and symptoms are called autistic-like.

Sometimes when we are are the pool these days and Julia tells me she wants to swim alone, I sit and watch her (and others). I can't help but follow parents with young kids – 6 month olds having their toes put in the water for the first time, yearlings with their funny duck walks being encouraged to walk in water, two year old showing mommies and daddies how well they can splash, stop jets of water, and “swim.” Parents ooh and ah and give high fives and scoop up and hug. Those things that are ALL so simple. Nothing remarkable at all. And it breaks my heart that no one did these things for my Julia. Sometimes I have no words for how awful I feel. I want to stuff her heart and soul full of what she did not get when she was younger.

Julia has a scenerio that we go through often. She announces that she is the baby dinosaur and asks if I am the mommy. And I answer that if she is the baby dino then I will be the mommy dino just to be her mommy. We do this with all kinds of animal and movie characters. It seems like a good little playlet.

We have done 11 letters so far. I don't think we have gone any further than what she knows from school, but we do the putnik cheer, we hand spell, she work on my direction page and two or three Starfall pages. We put the letter on the wall in two ways, we name all the letters we have. As last activity, we make the letter on the window (with special window marker). My goal is not to lose ground this summer and to gain some. With this in mind, we are doing it.