10 July 2010

Saturday

I will be writing more, much more very soon, but I am busy with so much on the outside. So much I want to describe, so much I want to discuss, so much . . . . Today, we are having a dinner that Cheshire is hosting, and we are all fried. Thank god for take out.

I am still writing what I will say tomorrow at the memorial. Still trying to give words, beautiful words to my life with David. I have something, and what it ends up to be must be, it is all that I can do. all I can do right now. And now is when I need to say it.

So many fears right now. So many rotten irrational fears that I have to live with until I can quell them with the rational thought. Rocky, rocky, rocky road ahead.

But for today, we are a chrysalis.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Suzanne, How I wish I could be there by your side right know to let you cry or talk or sit. I just wish I could take all this pain away and make your hurts disappear.

Bill, woke up from a nap earlier today looked around and said you need to be with your sister. You can still make a plane. I told him I needed to be with him and you wanted me with him. He told me you and the children mattered at this point and he would be okay.

I said again, it is okay that you and I would be together when the time was right all round and that you understood.

But please know we are with you in sprit and heart and we both love you a great deal. I found a local church that had a mass at 1:30PM tomorrow and I will go there and remember you, David, Chesire & Julia.

In what every you say tomorrow at David's service please say. My sister Carol is her in sprit and she loved David a great deal. I really hope he and you knew that.

All my love to you now and always.

Love,
Carol