17 October 2011

Lying fallow. The Update.


Today I did what I needed to do, and it doesn’t feel like enough. Lying fallow is not glamorous.


I woke up at 5:45. Meditated for 15 minutes and woke Julia up at 6:09. I got her dressed -- she actually complained a bit about not being able to do it herself, and I silently sent up a prayer of thanks for such a complaint. Replaced a few bandaids that had fallen off in the night. Really, used bandaids are strewn throughout the house. The dog takes no interest in them and I just walk around pocketing them until I get to a trash can. I know that Julia is not taking them off -- at least for the most part -- and I never see them falling, but like the leaves in my gardens, bandaids rain.


I served Julia breakfast in three courses. First, drugs -- last day of steroid --, then, banana, then waffles. Doing it this way is so much more efficient that presenting her with all of the meal at the same time. She ate, complained that she couldn’t color before school. We did strong sitting for 10 minutes and tapped a bit. Then it was on the bus and off.


I walked the dog, ate my muffins, covered the piles of belongings in the basement with plastic sheeting, recovered the last load of wash from the dryer. Access from the kitchen to the rest of the house with a laundry basket is still easier going out the back door and in the front door. I washed dishes in the bathroom, put away clothes, picked up and cleaned up a bit, and then sat down to figure out my sink and faucet.


The sink that I wanted -- considering size, material, and cost -- is on backorder and could be delayed up to 8 weeks. I’m looking for a stainless steel sink, drop in (or overmount), 16-18 guage, at least 30 inches wide, with a back lip for the faucet to be attached into. In truth, there is only one model in any brand that meets this criteria. The size is a bit bigger than the usual, and the drop in quality is not in favor right now. Or it is in the cheaper sinks. This is a plain, ordinary looking sink that people want to pay very little for. Most people willing to pay what I am are looking at undermount sinks or something fancy like the farm house front sinks.


So, I find the perfect one but it is on back order. I find two more that cost a bit more but the price is now edging up towards the Kohler which evidently is a brand name that cost most just because of the brand name. But now the Kohler is looking pretty good and I find an on line place to order from. The shipping is free, which strangely is not true if I order it from my local plumbing supply store, and the price is 8 dollars shy of 300 dollars less than if I order it locally. And I finally commit to a faucet -- ugh, I don’t want to write about the faucet.


This renovation process is so strange. I have gone through all of my life so far never, ever choosing a sink or a faucet. This is not like a sweater -- I know which collars don’t look good and which wools are itchy. And this is not like shopping for a wedding dress. Maybe I dreamed about what I would look like at my wedding -- I hadn’t and didn’t, for the record, but I had been to weddings. And yes, I have been in kitchens. Many. But I’ve never looked critically at sinks and faucet. You bet, I’m going to be doing that now.


So the sink and faucet ordering took most of the morning. I did consult with Ed before placing the order and talked to a very nice lady who processed the order. By the time I was finished, however, it was time to run across to the bus stop to get Julia and get her to clinic for therapy. Then, it was the Y for me. Yes, the second week of my fitness commitment! I have to build up to a decent work out but I did break a slight sweat today and my heart rate broke 120. It sucks being old and having to moderately break into my old workout. Right now, I am warming up, doing 20 minutes in a fast walk on the treadmill, work on the weight machines and do 10 minutes on the elliptical. I hope that in a few weeks, I am on the elliptical instead of the treadmill, take a yoga class, and incorporate swimming.


Then it is errands -- more bandages, a few food items, returning the boots that I bought on Saturday. Oh, I have been really wanted casual boots. Boots that i could wear with a skirt. Boots that could dress up a pair of jeans. But I don’t want heels and that’s what I find. On Saturday, i found a pair in the store next to the store that I bought the material for Julia’s dinosaur costume in. The boots were almost perfect in shape and size, but they were this odd green-brown. I fit well and I bought them without too much thought as to what they would go with. Over the past two days, I’ve looked at the boots over and over and next to my clothes. They go with nothing except jeans. Although jeans are my preferred uniform and I could wear the boots with jeans, but not with my brown skirt, not even with black pants -- well, they might go with black pants if I was careful with the top. Too much trouble. And I really don’t want boots that go with just a few things. I want boots I could wear every day if I decided to. And so the books go back. Took them today. Found a pair of grey clogs that I can use much more often. A bit disappointed but satisfied that I stuck to my decision to simplify so much of my possessions including having many fewer shoes.


I finished errands, spent some time in B&N with a chai and my laptop, tapping away, before needing to pick up Julia at clinic, rush home to heat dinner (Feeling grateful for frozen soup), upstairs to a shower, review of the healing body, bandaging and bandaiding, and then to bed to read and to turn off the light for Julia to fall asleep.


That’s it. That’s it. Nothing engaging. Nothing challenging, unless it was about sinks and faucets. Here and present most of the day. Taking care of business and putting my house, literally and figuratively into order. Right now, wondering and not being present.


One more thing. During the driving and the errands and running Julia to and from clinic, I listened to and sung along with Joni Mitchell’s Blue. Just over and over a few times, indulging in her voice and matching my squeaks to her luscious sounds. Just before we pulled into the driveway, Julia asked, “Mommy, is that you on the CD?” Not a bad compliment for the end of the day.

2 comments:

Amber said...

I like to read about your life!

Anonymous said...

Me too.