18 June 2011

Last year, today. Was the last day of our normal family. We were excited about David's progress. He was back at work -- supposedly half time, more like 3/4+. Julia was going to clinic. I was riding my bike for exercise. I had my interview with the LEND folks. All was right with the world.

Reading last year's entry, I see no foreboding, no inkling of what was to come. How very blessed this day was last year. I would say that I wish that I could go back to then, but I can't. I know too much, what the next week looked like, what happened.

I mucked in the compost today -- I needed to take apart my pile because the chicken wire fencing posts were leaning into the piles and really cutting down on the space. I emptied it into piles on the back yard lawn. It will take a few days to work it all out -- more sorting and putting to the right order. There is some finished compost and I think I will dig a new garden bed in the back yard to put it in. My garden is not under complete control but the front looks the best it has ever looked. It is good to be playing with dirt these days.

We did a bit of food shopping -- Julia needs sandals and I forgot all about that. Then to the library -- easy chapter books for Julia. And she can read them. Then the pool, then dinner, a tv show from Australia called H2O about girls who turn into mermaids -- Julia is enchanted. Then a bit of work with math tiles and to bed for Julia.

We didn't do any of this a year ago, but it was just like this. A regular day, regular feelings, regular hopes and dreams.

“Life changes in the instant. You sit down to dinner and life as you know it ends." ~ Joan Didion.

Yeah, I remember that.

1 comment:

Snickerdoodle said...

Anniversaries can be so hard.

If you don't acknowledge the difficult ones, your body will. One way or another. So it is very good you are feeling the feelings. As powerful as they are. :(

You made it through one whole year. Day.by.day. :) That's all one can do.
Snick :)