27 November 2010

Our rag-tag Madison family is now under one roof. Julia and I home last night, and the house felt less than full. Latkah picked up this morning, and then DiDi Chi picked up from Amy's house after we did our food shopping.

There was some peace in this day's round. Once more, I am reminded that the chores once divided are still all necessary to do and must be done by me. Why does any family like mine do everything for themselves? Some kind of co-housing, co-family life would be much preferred, and yet, I want to stay in this house.

So, this morning the sun was so strong that it felt warm. WARM! It was gardening -- cleaning really, but cutting down the last rose bush and cleaning up the corner beds. I am stiff tonight from the work, maybe not the work itself but the cold and the work. It is almost time to take out the flannel lined pants -- almost.

After Julia's therapy, we had tomato soup and went food shopping and picked up DiDi and came back home. Then, Julia had time to pick at the fossil kit that Lisa and Nick gave her and draw. I cleaned up the kitchen and cooked -- salad for me for a few days, sweet potato casserole with marshmallows for Julia. She ate like she used to today.

Talking to Lisa and Cheshire. Together. There is something there, some answer, some direction. Questions in these answers. If nothing else, a step. It is a step.


Skyrider said...


One of the hardest things for me to do, when I became single, was to understand when to let things go. I became one person doing the work of two, and the juggling became very difficult. My mantra became "Do not do that which others can easily do". This pared down a lot of extraneous stuff, and allowed me to concentrate on that which really mattered.

You may want to delay/reconsider goals which will add to the current stress level. Taking care of yourself must be priority #1. You are dear to many.

BTW, who is Lisa? Your sister?

Suz said...

Yes, I want to be on top of everything. It is hard to let go. It makes me feel weak and a failure. Even though I know what you are saying is so true.

Lisa is my dear, best friend from college days. She is my older daughter's godmother and my touch stone at all times.