9/11/2010

Today, this morning. Waking up slowly, watching part of a way too romantic movie with Julia who loves the strong female lead fighting with sword and knife and being mouthy with everyone. Yes, Ever After. Only tough moment was in the beginning when the Daddy died. Does every movie for kids have dead parents? Getting ready to leave for the wedding later on today. Doing a few email chores. Thinking of the day as well. A day so long ago, and just yesterday when my city was hurt. I see Sept. 11 as simply that. And like so many others, I stared at a tv screen, mouth open. Now, I cannot believe that we have not grown to wanting to heal and not hurt more. When will we learn?

Last night, I realized the power that writing my vision statement gave to me. I still have an imagination! I can still make plans that are fantastical! I can acknowledge that I may never make it to China to open foster homes, although I may get there for other reasons. So much depends on so much. Will I find a voice and a way to do such incredible things? Will Julia be able to stand such a life? More, can she thrive there? And can I bear to be away from a supportive community and loving friends?

But I have dreamed it and put in down on paper. That is something.

Today, is Sarah and Andy's wedding. Julia and I will leave soon for Spring Green about an hour away. This was the third of our summer weddings. So much has changed for me, for us, since we got the invitations. I will dance at the wedding today. I will think of David and I will think of the future.

Oh, I think way too much. Maybe I can do a bit of laughing and crying as well.